DiscoverReal Talk with Lisa Sonni: Relationships UncensoredWhy You Believed His Lies: The Psychology of Manipulation and Abuse | Ep 010
Why You Believed His Lies: The Psychology of Manipulation and Abuse | Ep 010

Why You Believed His Lies: The Psychology of Manipulation and Abuse | Ep 010

Update: 2025-07-22
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Somebody can look you dead in the eye, say everything that you've been dying to hear, and they can still be lying to you. The science behind deception in abusive relationships reveals how manipulators weaponize psychology to systematically break down their victims. This is the podcast they don’t want you listening to.

This week, I'm joined by Dr. Abbie Maroño, a behavioral expert with a PhD in psychology who trains the Secret Service and FBI on deception, body language, and influence. 

We explore the disturbing world of psychological manipulation and how abusers use sophisticated tactics to deceive their victims. Dr. Abbey breaks down the neuroscience behind why we fall for manipulation, explaining how it's not about intelligence but about being human in a world where predators understand psychology. We discuss how abusers systematically strip away your sense of self to gain control, the difference between everyday cognitive dissonance and traumatic cognitive dissonance, and why "love bombing" and intermittent reinforcement create biological addiction. 

Dr. Abbie reveals how false vulnerability is weaponized to fast-track intimacy and trust, why we rationalize abusive behavior, and the concerning trend of men's dating coaches teaching these same manipulation tactics. She emphasizes that manipulators don't need to be "book smart" - they learn through experience and lack of empathy, exploiting the brain's shortcuts to appear trustworthy. We also dive into her experience training law enforcement and the shocking lack of trauma-informed training in the criminal justice system, highlighting why taking time in relationships is crucial for spotting deception.

Connect with Dr. Abbie on Instagram here: @doctorabbieofficial 

Ger her book, The Upper Hand

Support the show

This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.

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You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

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Why You Believed His Lies: The Psychology of Manipulation and Abuse | Ep 010

Why You Believed His Lies: The Psychology of Manipulation and Abuse | Ep 010

Lisa Sonni